Have you ever felt disheartened or frustrated by the lack of support from your family and friends?
Do you wish they’d ask you how it’s going, buy one of your products, like your Social Media posts or share your website? And then start to feel a bit sad when they don’t?
Maybe you then start to question whether your friends take your Business seriously and THEN you start to ask yourself whether you’re actually good enough to be successful at it. If you’re nodding along to this then I promise you you’re not alone. One of the things that comes up for the women I work with regularly is the feeling of lack of support from a spouse or family member. It can cause all sorts of anxieties, doubts and negative self talk - none of which are conducive to a successful Business.
I frequently see women in business asking in online communities what to do when you have a negative family member or spouse. Or what to do when you don’t feel supported in your Business. How to handle it when a friend supports other small businesses but not yours.
So in this Blog Post I wanted to answer that for you. Because if you’re here, still reading this far, then it must be on your mind too.
So here’s what to do when a family member or friend doesn’t support your Business:
Are you ready?
Answer: Nothing. You do nothing.
I know, I know, that’s not the answer you wanted. But I promise you, it’s the answer.
And now I’ll give you 2 reasons why.
1. THEIR LACK OF SUPPORT IS NOT ABOUT YOU
Let me ask you this - how many times do you ask your friends how their job is? Do you take a look at the website of their employer and share it on your social media platforms? If your friend works in retail do you only shop from there to support your friend in their employment?
Have you found yourself glazing over sometimes when your spouse is telling you about something that happened at work and you have no idea what he’s talking about but you’re trying to show interest?
How interested and invested are you in what they do? How many of your friends do you know exactly what they do? You may know who he or she works for but do you know exactly what they do? You’ve probably got other things to talk about when you catch up right?
I ask you this because if you turn that around, they probably just don’t ‘get’ your Business. Maybe they don’t even give it a second thought because it’s YOUR job, your work.
I’d always suggest to journal these kinds of questions out. Ask yourself what you actually feel about the lack of support and why you feel that way. Is it your own self doubt and self belief? Are you worried that nobody will be interested in what you offer and so feel let down when your friends don’t seem to be? There’s always fears and blocks to get clear on that you then get to shift.
2. THEY'RE NOT YOUR IDEAL CLIENT
I’m sure you’ve heard of the importance of knowing your ideal client? That when you try and talk to everybody you’ll end up talking to nobody? There’s such a sea of noise, especially on social media, of other people selling their products, of other people selling a very similar (or the exact same) thing as you. What’s going to help you to stand out is knowing exactly who you’re talking to (and I don’t just mean how many kids they have and how old they are.) There’s a very good chance that your seemingly negative or unsupportive friend or family member isn’t your ideal customer. If your ideal customer is a 35 year old woman with a new baby under a year old, then what does it matter if your 84 year old uncle is negative about your business?
Sometimes it can actually do more harm than good to have your friends and family and everyone you know follow you on Facebook just so the stats looks better, because Facebook will see the kind of people that are joining and push your page out to more people with similar interests. If your mum who loves needlecraft and Eric Clapton likes and shares everything you post on your Facebook Business Page, Facebook will assume it’s relevant to someone like her and will show it to more women who are interested in needlecraft and Eric Clapton (and just for the avoidance of doubt, I’m not saying there’s ANYTHING wrong with liking needlecraft and Eric Clapton - I happen to like both! - but if your ideal customers don’t then it’s a little bit pointless getting your social media posts in front of them).
So get really REALLY clear on who your ideal customers are and then focus on THEM thinking your products are amazing. Your friends and family already think you’re amazing, they probably just want to talk about other things when you catch up.
So what now? Well here’s 3 things for you to focus on if you don't feel the support from friends and family members:
1. I want you to understand that you’re GOOD ENOUGH just as you are. I’d do some journaling around not feeling supported and see what comes up for you. There may be some deeper fears and blocks come to the surface that you get to work through.
2. Make sure that you’re crystal clear on who your ideal customer is and if you’re not sure then do some work on this. Before you create any more products or do any more marketing, get clear on this. When you know who you’re talking to it makes everything so much easier!
3. Connect with other fabulous women in business who WILL support you. Because they get you, they understand why you’re doing this and they’ve felt it all too. It’s super important to surround yourself with women who will lift you up and light you up, who will celebrate you and support you. On that note, you’ll find that in abundance in my free Community The Practical Woo Community so head over there now and find your Tribe.
You’re amazing, you deserve it and you’ve totally got this.
Love Gemma x